WHAT IS THE WHOLE SELF LIFESTYLE™?
• What’s the purpose of my life?
• Who am I now that I’m a parent?
• How can I recover the parts of myself I feel like I’ve lost?
• How can I make the most of my time here on this planet?
• How can I enjoy this journey called parenthood, and look back with fond memories rather than regrets?
And through the Whole SELF Lifestyle™ Method, we break that philosophy down into practice. You learn how to analyze and improve every area of your life, and how to blend them in your own unique way to create a full and balanced life as a working parent. You learn how to manage the practical, day-to-day demands that cause the most stress, conflict, and burnout.
THE WHOLE SELF LIFESTYLE™ METHOD
I designed the Whole SELF Lifestyle™ Method to help professional moms and dads integrate key areas of their life in a way that works for them. Working parents get so overloaded with mundane obligations that they neglect the areas of their life are most meaningful to them… often first among them their relationships and time for themselves. But when all aspects of your life are working well together, there’s no limit to the fulfillment you can experience. The Whole SELF Lifestyle™ Method allows you to analyze and improve each area of your life, as well as how you can blend them in your own unique way to create a full and balanced life as a working parent.
S | SYSTEM INVENTORY
FOCUS | Detached Observation
Our lives are made up of a complex series of systems (a group of interacting entities that form a unified whole). The more efficient each system is, and the more they’re designed to operate in congruence with each other, the happier and healthier we feel in our lives – the more WHOLE we are. The first step of the Whole SELF Lifestyle™ framework is to complete an inventory of the different systems that are operating in your life right now.
E | EVALUATE
FOCUS | Critical Analysis
Once you have identified the different systems that are currently active in your life, it’s time to evaluate each one to see what’s working for you, and what isn’t. You also evaluate how all of the systems are working together. You’ll also imagine what your life could look like instead – your ideal. Once you’ve analyzed these systems, and how things are working together, then you can identify what needs to happen to get from where you currently are, to where you want to go.
L | LIST OF SOLUTIONS
FOCUS | Curiosity and Exploration
The first two steps of the Whole SELF Lifestyle™ framework provide clarity and a roadmap for change for you. From there, you’re in a position to brainstorm a list of areas you want to improve to make the biggest impact in your life (triage). This is when it’s helpful to do research, listen to podcasts, read books, get advice, seek therapy if needed, etc. Just In Time Learning (vs. Just In Case Learning) helps you leverage the information available to you without being overwhelmed.
F | FAMILIARIZE
FOCUS | Self-Discovery
Once you have experimented in real-time with new solutions (habits, routines, insights, etc.), then you will have the ability to make the best of those actions and beliefs a part of who you are. In this step, you work on establishing a solid support system to keep you accountable and to offer encouragement and feedback as you implement new habits. You’ll continue to practice these things, until you get to the level of “unconscious competency,” where you no longer need to try to do these things. Over time, you’ll integrate your new habits and beliefs into your overall lifestyle.
Self-discovery happens, and can only happen, if you’ve gone through all four of these steps. Most people today spend all of their time in Step 3, ignoring Steps 1, 2, and 4. This contributes to those feelings of overwhelm, failure, and guilt since they’re just consuming a ton of information without any strategy or direction. Once you know the Whole SELF Lifestyle™ Method, you can repeat these steps whenever you’re feeling burned out, when a big life shift happens, or if you’re just feeling unhappy and craving an upgrade of the quality of your life.
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